|I had forgotten how funny this show use to be.
Subject: Hollywood Squares Questions
These great questions and answers are from the days when ‘ Hollywood Squares’ game show responses were spontaneous, not scripted, as they are now. Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions, of course.. ;
Q.. Paul, what is a good reason for pounding meat?
A. Paul Lynde: Loneliness!
(The audience laughed so long and so hard it took up almost 15 minutes of the show!)
Q. Do female frogs croak?
A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough.
Q. If you’re going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be
A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.
Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.
A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes.
Q. You’ve been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman?
A. Don Knotts: That’s what’s been keeping me awake.
Q. According to Cosmopolitan, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he’s married?
A.. Rose Marie: No wait until morning.
Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?
A.. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency..
Q. In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say ‘I Love You’?
A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty..
Q. What are ‘Do It,’ ‘I Can Help,’ and ‘I Can’t Get Enough’?
A. George Gobel: I don’t know, but it’s coming from the next apartment.
Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking?
A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I’ll give you a gesture you’ll never forget.
Q. Paul, why do Hell’s Angels wear leather?
A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.
Q. Charley, you’ve just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year?
A. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I’m too busy growing strawberries.
Q. In bowling, what’s a perfect score?
A.. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.
Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps. One is politics, what is the other?
A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures.
Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet?
A. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I’m always safe in the bedroom.
Q. Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls?
A. Marty Allen: Only after lights out.
Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do?
A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?
Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?
A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.
Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people?
A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.
Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is it?
A. Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn’t neglected.
Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head, what was he trying to do?
A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.
Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant?
A. Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant?
Q. When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for its sex?
A. Charley Weaver: I’ll lend him the car, the rest is up to him
Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?
A. Charley Weaver: His feet.
Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in bed?
A. Paul Lynde: Point and laugh
WE DON’T STOP LAUGHING BECAUSE WE GROW OLD, WE GROW OLD BECAUSE WE STOP LAUGHING!
- 414,707 hits
“Please Donate To Help Us Stay Online”
- ‘Conditions of use
- Boudica Scoreboard / Alexis Ainsworth
- BPOV / Alexis Ainsworth
- “A BOUDICA POINT OF VIEW: Take No Prisoners” / Alexis Ainsworth
- “JULY 2011 UPDATE: ONE MORE SOROS SHOT ACROSS THE BOW: ‘NEWS OF THE WORLD GOES DOWN’. BSkyB IN DANGER OF MISCARRYING; BECK BELIEVES HIS MORMON GOD AVENGING NEWSCORP/FOX MISCARRY OF JUSTICE FOR COVERT SALE OF HIS HEAD TO SOROS!”
- “OBAMA’S ISRAEL ODYSSEY”: TALES OF 21ST C. ISLAMIC MYTHOLOGY Muslim hallucinations of supernatural power vs. the world’s only authentic superpower: ISRAEL
- “A ‘FAIR AND BALANCED’ TRILOGY’ “OPEN LETTER TO FOX / NEWSCORP: No More ‘Fair and Balanced’? ROGER AND RUPERT HAVE GONE POTTY AND DOTTY OVER OBAMA”
- “LIM, RUGER & KIM LLP + ADR SERVICES LOS ANGELES, HON. GREGORY C. O’BRIEN ARBITRATOR + MIN & DON CHAE vs. McCLELLAN & ASSOC. ARCHITECT = FRAUD – PLUS COUNTERFEIT LAWSUITS = MULTIPLE FRAUD
- “TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD REDUX” RACIAL BIAS IS BREAD AND BUTTER OF AMERICA’S ETHNO-CENTRIC LAW FIRMS
- “The Ballad of Fannie & Freddie goes Viral”, “FANNIE AND FREDDIE WERE LOVERS….until He cheated”: The story of the crash of 2008 in a real-life obituary”
- “NONSENSE, BOUDICA TAKES ON OBAMA – AND, THE TALKERS”
- “GLENN BECK MISSES THE POINT – AND THE LOCATION – OF ‘CRIME INC.’!”
- “TREASON AND SHROUD; IRAN ESCORTS OBAMA TO WORLD DICTATORSHIP THRU STRAITS OF 2012” Preface / Alexis Ainsworth
- “T&S Dreamers, Schemers & Reamers / Alexis Ainsworth
- 1. / “Letter to Obama”
- 2. / “Letter to Warren Buffett”
- 3. / “Letter to The Envy Class”
- 4. / “HOW JOHN ROBERTS RESET ‘OBAMACARE TO PUTINCARE’”/ LETTER TO J. ROBERTS CC: VLADIMIR PUTIN – PART I
- @LadyB117 @ophidianpilot Missing in action, they're all missing in action whe Islam is involved. 3 hours ago
- Welcome to my new 6 followers and goodbye to 6 unfollowers (FREE stats by unfollowspy.com) 8 hours ago
- Gained 5 followers and lost 4 (stats by unfollowspy.com) 1 day ago
- 5 people followed me today tracked by unfollowspy.com 2 days ago
- Last 24 Hours = 4 Followers and 4 Unfollowers (stats by unfollowspy.com app) 3 days ago
- Muslim girls in chains being led off to meet their new husbands via The Patriot
- Airport, border screening. Sniffer Pigs.
- “A BOUDICA POINT OF VIEW: Take No Prisoners” / Alexis Ainsworth
- Redneck Mouse Trap - you have got to see this!!
- Michelle Bachmann to CUFI: 'Obama abetting Muslim Brotherhood against Israel, & ultimately USA
- This is what the Muslims do to opposing sects within Islam
- Coming to a young white girl near you courtesy of B Hussein Obama!
- Know what's worse than green eggs and ham?? Apparently Uncle Sam and his Healthcare scam!
- 2. / "Letter to Warren Buffett"
- This Morn I was Accused Of Lying That the Quran Does Not Advocate killing Nonbelievers Errrr Helloooo....
- Obama Hates The Damn Country But GOP Defends Him
- A Good First Step To Fixing America
- Valerie Jarrett, Michelle & Barack Laugh At Obama Hating America
- Just Sayin
- Subud Messiah Obama knows EXACTLY what he’s doing (4 Islam). About his LOGO
- BPI reblog Daily Archives: February 25, 2015
- #ObamaTownHall Apparently true, Obama doing nothing to stop them. Big question, whose side is he on?
- Obama negotiating with terrorists
- Obama and his Muslim Invasion
- The Message! Islam Is Great At Violent Extremist Summit At White House
- 2nd amendment 2012 election abortion allah American embassy attacks american freedom attorney general eric holder barack obama benghazi bloggers blogs BPI random tweets Daily Archives BPI reblog BPI reblog Daily Archives christians common sense communism congress constitution current-events democrats education egypt From America c2c god gun control gun rights hamas hillary clinton humor iran iraq ISIS islam israel jihad jodi miller lesbians gays bisexuals transgenders liberals libya mark levin michelle obama middle-east middle east mitt romney muhammad muslim brotherhood muslims News Busted newt gingrich obama obamacare obama communist obama failed policies Obama liar palestinians pamela geller personal liberty politics republicans russia satire sharia Syria terrorism tweets twitter tyranny us military video vladimir putin wayne allyn root whatever happen to common sense Wild Bill for America www youtube
- 2012 elections Allah al quaeda America Barack Obama bloggers Blogs Caliphate Communist Congress cults Democrat Democratic Party freedom government government corruption government deception government failure Iran Islam Islamist Israel Jihad jihadists liberal liberty middle east Muhammad Muslims Obama Obama Administration Obamacare Obamunism Pelosi politicians President Obama Reid Republican Sharia law socialism stealth jihad terrorism threats tyranny Uncategorized USA US Constitution war War on Terror War with Islam